Angela Masciulli on Crafting a Business Fueled by Energy and Connection
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Episode Summary
On today's Project: Mom Podcast episode, I invite you to sit down with Angela Masciulli and me for an intimate heart-to-heart.
Together, we journey through the rollercoaster of entrepreneurship and the delicate dance of motherhood, touching on our personal growth stories. Listen in as Angela shares her incredible shift from the legal arena to the vibrant world of travel and how she uncovered her true self-worth. We also chat about the power of a resilient mindset, the magic that happens when you surround yourself with the right people, and a game-changing realization: we don’t owe anyone anything.
Remember, simply being you is your superpower, and understanding who you are is where true success begins. Join us for a mix of inspiration, empowerment, and a genuine conversation on navigating motherhood and our professional dreams.
Topics Discussed:
Angela’s transformative shift from legal expertise to her passion for the travel industry
Tackling the intricate balance between motherhood and cultivating a growth mindset
Discover the ultimate strategies for heightened efficiency, energy management, and building genuine business connections
The importance of rising above societal norms and personal hurdles to embrace true success and contentment
Angela's insights on identifying and leveraging your distinct talents and contributions
About Angela:
In 2022, Angela became an accidental business coach and podcaster supporting moms who wanted to start and grow their businesses. After she started her travel business, other moms wanted to know how she started and grew her business. Unexpectedly, a new passion for empowering and coaching self-doubting mom business owners was born!
Angela considers it her duty to help as many moms as possible live life more courageously on their terms so that they can have more time and energy for their families as business owners.
Angela's podcast, The Good Enough Mompreneur, is focused on the mindset and strategies necessary for moms to start and flourish as the CEOs of their own businesses while also balancing the challenges of motherhood and family. She has inspiring conversations with female entrepreneurs and motivational speakers about their paths to empowerment.
Resources Mentioned:
Connect with Angela:
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Emily Gorrie (00:02.368)
Welcome to today's episode of the Project Mom Podcast. Today I'm chatting with Angela Mishuli. She is a business coach for moms who are looking to kickstart and grow their businesses, all while mastering the art of balancing motherhood and life with grace. Angela is also the host of the Good Enough Mompreneur podcast. So Angela, welcome. Thank you so much for joining me today.
Angela Masciulli (00:26.106)
Oh, thank you, Emily. I'm so delighted to be here. It's therapy for me to have the podcast, but also to share time and have conversations with moms who are also entrepreneurs and get it. It's like we're just like bees in a hive. So yes, thank you.
Emily Gorrie (00:44.908)
Yes, I love that. Of course, I love that you share that because we, it's so true. It's like so therapeutic to share our journeys and share our experiences and to make these connections. I mean, without these connections, where are we? We can't thrive. So I am thrilled that you're here and that you're excited to be having these conversations. And I want to start with...
Emily Gorrie (01:14.104)
your journey. So I know your kids are a little bit older, but talk to us a little bit about organically how your current role, right, really as a business coach became kind of more organically your mission, your energy out of something that, you know, kind of wasn't, you know, you started as like, I think a travel agent or something like that, or you had a travel business. And I want to hear a little bit about how this business organically came about.
Emily Gorrie (01:44.341)
and where motherhood played a role for you in that.
Angela Masciulli
Yeah, thank you for that question. And I love sharing these stories myself. I mean, I just think they're so life-giving and then help people see how they can create their own story. But so, I've been an entrepreneur for almost a decade. And really, my entrepreneurial journey was born out of necessity because I was a military spouse.
Military spouses have a very high unemployment rate. They are often not looked at as great hires because they potentially move or have a diversity of experience, or they have a lot of burdens to carry. I mean, as I did, I had a family member I was taking care of at one point, I had little children, and there were oftentimes where I was a single parent. So I really needed to have an employer
Angela Masciulli (02:46.262)
gave me flexibility, you know? And I think without directly saying that, you know, people, when I would go to be hired for a job and they would be like, oh, why did you just move here? And I would say, why? Immediately they would connect the dots and I wouldn't get a job offer or whatever. Even though, you know, I had great experience and, you know, I really am, I had a...
Emily Gorrie (02:50.281)
Mmm, yeah.
Emily Gorrie (03:07.865)
Mmm... Mm-hmm.
Angela Masciulli (03:15.846)
legal career for more than two decades and I still do some consulting in that area. One of the highest trained legal professionals and what I did in the country, but still people would just be like, we don't know how long you're going to be here. So, and I also, yeah, and I just wasn't willing to make that trade-off with my children.
Angela Masciulli (03:45.506)
I wanted to be there. I didn't want to hire a nanny or babysitter. So I was like, I have to make this work. I have to be able to share my gifts. I have to be able to earn an income to empower myself. And, you know, I need to figure this out. So it was born out of necessity. I think that's why I'm so passionate about like...
Angela Masciulli (04:09.462)
especially moms with very young children who are trying to have to make that decision, do I wanna return back to work or not? And I don't think that we should have to make that trade off at all. I mean, we can create the work environment that works for us. And I just really love empowering moms to do that. So yeah, my husband did retire from the military.
Angela Masciulli (04:38.23)
And you know, the funny thing is, is even though I was settled, once again, it was like, oh, you have this diversity of experience. We really don't know where you fit with our organization. One of my dream employers wanted to hire me. I was in the process for six months. Finalist, didn't get hired. And I was really sick and tired of waiting for people to give me an opportunity. So tired of it.
Angela Masciulli (05:06.442)
So I'm just like, I'm gonna create my own opportunities. Forget it. You know? So I still continued working in the legal field, but there was a point too where I missed traveling as a military family because that's a large part of the experience for a lot of military families. And I really discounted my expertease in that area and didn't really take it seriously. And I had friends who were like, you need to do this because everybody came to me for it. I took it for granted how easy it was for me and what I knew. And we do that so often as moms and women. We just take for granted what we know. We don't give it credit. We don't add it to our self-worth bucket. So I decided
Angela Masciulli (06:02.534)
I took a vacation and it was transformative for my life. And I was like, I want other people to experience this and I want to help them do it. So yeah, I still do have a travel agency and I do selectively work with families and couples and groups and whatnot to take amazing vacations and it's so cool. And my family does it too. So yeah, I'm just a multi-passionate entrepreneur that just tries not to put limits on myself and what's possible. And yeah, and so out of the travel agency, people were like, you know, who do you like, okay, Angela, who the heck do you think you are? And some people might not have said that exactly, but that was kind of their, like, for real, like, who do you think you are? Like just starting a business and just,
Angela Masciulli (06:59.83)
Like what? And that's when I realized that there was really this space that needed to be filled on helping people see that this was possible for themselves, especially moms. And, you know, and there are, there are all, of course, all these other phases of business, but I think that the momentum to just get started is probably one of the toughest things.
Angela Masciulli (07:29.642)
Yeah, so it's so crazy. I won a scholarship from Kathy Heller to learn how to podcast. I don't know if you know who Kathy Heller is. So I wanted to learn how to podcast for my travel business, but there was like this group coaching session where somebody started talking about how people get stuck and not feeling good enough. And that is exactly how I felt.
Angela Masciulli (07:57.706)
and just starting a podcast. And I'm like, I have kept people alive. I've run my family while my husband's gone. I've given birth. I've done all of these things. Yet here I am feeling like I have no right to be doing this. And like, what the heck is this about? And I heard other people talk about it. I'm like, why is nobody talking about this? This is insanity. Like, why is this happening?
Emily Gorrie (08:20.74)
Absolutely.
Angela Masciulli (08:26.794)
So I swear, I, and to this day, you know, most of my passion goes into this accidental podcast that I started because I get so much feedback. I get so much response from people like, yes, thank you, you know, or just want to share their stories. I have had such incredible women reach out to me.
Angela Masciulli (08:53.934)
to just badass women who are like, do you think you'd wanna share my story? I'm like, oh my gosh, yes, absolutely. Yeah, and so I have now found this other passion that, you know, bigger picture of helping moms start and grow their businesses, like whether it's from the momentum of just starting it.
Emily Gorrie (09:04.076)
Of course I do, yeah.
Angela Masciulli (09:20.59)
to finding that rut maybe where they had the momentum to start it, but now they're just kind of like not knowing where to go next or just need that accountability or whatever. And yeah, I mean, there's so many phases of business that it just runs the gamut. And I've almost interviewed, we're almost at 100 episodes at this point recorded and
Emily Gorrie (09:33.188)
Confidence boost.
Angela Masciulli (09:50.094)
So I can take my experience, I can take all of the wisdom from all of these interviews and then, you know, kind of meld it together and just try to help moms, you know, live their lives on, you know, a new level, but also don't have to make a trade off, actually be better parents, feel more fulfilled, happier, so they can then serve their families. So.
Emily Gorrie (10:14.24)
Yes, it's incredible. I think the, there's, I wrote down a couple of things that I want to highlight because I love the, first off, the evolution, right, of the journey that you took from, you know, having your legal career, you know, becoming a military spouse, this, you know, almost like evolution internally too of like getting to a point where like,
Emily Gorrie (10:41.228)
you know, you're empowering yourself, giving yourself opportunities, finding ways to give yourself income, right, for internal fulfillment. You know, you mentioned there was a part of you that at some point was kind of sick of waiting for other people to give you these opportunities, right? So you created them for yourself. You were discounting your expertise at one point, right? It's like, and these resonate so strongly because I think when we...
Emily Gorrie (11:09.944)
go to start a business or we become moms for the first time, like we don't know what we don't know. And I think sometimes we fall into this rut almost of externally looking for guidance to, am I doing this correctly? Am I keeping this newborn baby alive correctly? Is this the right path? Am I doing all the quote unquote right things to launch this business, get it off the ground? And there's a lot of
Emily Gorrie (11:40.708)
mindset work that goes into being able to do this. And I so appreciate kind of you sharing your evolution because I think it also reminds us to trust that everything we're experiencing is meant to bring something to the table for us. It's adding to our self-worth bucket. It's not, you know, because it seemingly is all over the place.
Emily Gorrie (12:08.364)
doesn't mean it's not valuable, right? These are all experiences that we are taking in and internalizing and being able to in turn then give back to other groups of people, clients, communities, whatever kind of looks most honoring for us, but we can then give back and it's all so valuable. So I wanna talk a little bit about mindset with you. And that can either be from
Emily Gorrie (12:37.824)
your personal experience or kind of situations that you've had with clients that you've had or people from your podcast. I wonder from your experience, how important has mindset been and what are some examples maybe that you can give us where you've had to maybe take a pause and reframe how you've looked at something? Kind of how did that help you get to a more honoring place for yourself.
Angela Masciulli (13:11.562)
Yeah, and that is, I am fascinated by the opportunity to experience what many call a spiritual awakening in becoming an entrepreneur. And it was months after this started that I realized this is exactly what happened to me because I knew I had worked so hard and I knew I had a lot to give.
Angela Masciulli (13:40.734)
and I knew there had to be more. I just didn't know how to access it. And I knew I had to stop waiting for other people. So I had to tap into how do I figure this out? And literally, and it started with a very dramatic event. My husband lost his job unexpectedly. And I was like, this is it, forget it. Nobody's giving me the opportunities I want. My husband is. brilliant, has served in the military for 20 years, this is BS. We have been sold a lie. And so I was on this pursuit and I love this idea of if you are dissatisfied with anything in your life, really the approach I think that you should take is to kind of analyze
Angela Masciulli (14:37.994)
What is it about myself that has led to the reality I'm living in right now? And taking radical responsibility for that. And giving yourself a lot of grace because it doesn't matter how it happened. And for me, it really uncovered I'm a recovering people pleaser. I am a recovering overachiever.
Angela Masciulli (15:07.522)
I had no idea that in becoming an entrepreneur, I did not realize that I was a CPTSD survivor. I had a lot of childhood trauma and had a lot of coping mechanisms that helped me get through that situation that didn't serve me as an adult. So...
Angela Masciulli (15:29.21)
I love delving into the mindset and the control, learning and teaching people the control that we have over our own reality and experience. And transitioning from a victim to in blaming to taking responsibility and finding out what action we can take and what we have control over ourselves. And that is so empowering.
Angela Masciulli (15:58.93)
It is just probably understanding that how our brain works too. It's like that most of the time it lies to us. So I think that is a fundamental part of becoming a thriving business owner, quite honestly, because you're going to run into all of these things that are your brain's trying to keep you safe, and you're trying to accomplish all of these things you've never done before.
Angela Masciulli (16:26.978)
So your brain is going to lie to you all of the time. You know, it thinks that you are fighting a wooly mammoth, but you're just trying to do an Instagram Live. It doesn't know the difference. And I really love getting into the psychology that is particularly challenging for online business owners, which are most of the people that I work with.
Angela Masciulli (16:54.422)
because that creates a lot of mind drama. You have to really get out of your own way in that situation. And it's something you just have to continually work on. So for me, I think it's, John Maxwell has a statement that's, or a concept called the leadership lid where as a small medium sized business owner, it's
Angela Masciulli (17:21.694)
your business is only going to grow to the extent that you do. So the extent to which you make personal development, your focus and your priority, that is the degree to which your business will grow and thrive. So.
Angela Masciulli (17:40.594)
I mean, in 2019, I just sat, started this journey, literally walking and listening to podcasts and dreaming of one day that I would have a podcast. Not necessarily one that it is now, but I was like, you know, I wanna do this. This is so powerful and I have so much to say, but I didn't have confidence that I had, I had to literally find my voice. So.
Angela Masciulli (18:08.434)
I mean, I had been in a career that benefited from me being small and not, you know, I mean, law firms don't benefit from their professionals being independently minded. Like, you're as good as your last mistake. Don't go anywhere else. Nobody's going to want to hire you. You know?
Angela Masciulli (18:33.29)
I mean, all of the things that most industries will want to do to keep good employees and keep them small. I had to unlearn all of those limitations. I had to unlearn all of the limitations of my childhood and all of the experiences in my life and thought patterns that no longer serve me. So that was a very long-winded response. But.
Emily Gorrie (18:54.304)
Yes, I mean, I really appreciate that because I don't think enough of our growth is really like looked at in terms of like personal growth, like our business growth isn't usually looked at in terms of how we grow personally. And I really appreciate that because I think there's a lot of effort put towards, well, if I just do
Emily Gorrie (19:23.724)
the right things in business or I do the right marketing plan or I hire the right person to get me sales or whatever. But if we're not able to tap into kind of the values that we have or the limiting beliefs that we have or recognizing and I am releasing in just a couple of weeks, it will be out prior to this episode on the stories we tell ourselves. So just how much our mind.
Emily Gorrie (19:52.664)
plays tricks on us and what we see in our minds or what our minds are telling us are not necessarily truth or reality and it's just perceived based on all the experiences that we've had thus far in our lives. So I so appreciate you calling that out and I wanna talk a little bit about it and hoping you can give us some guidance and for those of us who are listening who are like, okay, okay now I have to look at myself. I have to look at maybe I do have some,
Emily Gorrie (20:22.564)
trauma from my childhood or maybe I'm, you know, have some limiting beliefs that are preventing me from this growth and it's keeping me in this rut. Like, where do you recommend that these people start? I mean, is it, you know, do you have podcasts you recommend? Is it, you know, trying to find a therapist? Like how do we start dipping our toes in the water of personal development?
Angela Masciulli (20:44.842)
Right. Yeah. And I'm realizing that maybe I didn't have give you some examples on the way that I shifted my mindset, you know, and I think so there are two ways I want to approach. So for me, I no longer look at maybe the lack of growth that I want as a result of somebody not returning a phone call or an email or something, it is on me. Did I show up the way that I needed to show up to get the results that I want? So that is an example of, you know, the way that I might have looked at a situation in the past as to now.
And I'm actually having a trauma specialist on the podcast. And she's the host of Mending Trauma. Her name is Dr. Hoyt. And so things that we can be aware of or where we should start is just awareness and curiosity. I think those two things are very key. Like,
Angela Masciulli (22:03.762)
I think being present, just trying to be present and observe yourself and others as you go about your day, as you interact with clients, as you're trying to achieve things in your business, build a team, whatnot. It takes a lot of work. But I think, you know, one thing that I have continued to start really...
Angela Masciulli (22:32.59)
working on too and have people on the podcast for is really getting home to ourselves and our intuition. Because like you said, we consistently think, oh, if I just get this coach or I take that course, or I do this thing, and then things are going to magically turn around. But really what our goal every day should be is more expansion in how we look.
Angela Masciulli (23:02.206)
and perceive things consciously, opposed to unconsciously, because, you know, we all tend to, unless you are very blessed to have a parent in your life that might be more spiritually minded, we tend to live a large part of our life unconsciously until an event happens where there's a pain point that makes us change, just like in 2019.
I was just like, this is it. This is just not, I subconsciously agreed that if I did all the things, if I checked all the boxes in life that it was gonna happen for me, I was gonna be happy. I had the family, I had the education, I had, I even had a good job, but I still was not fulfilled. I didn't feel satisfied.
Angela Masciulli (23:57.67)
I didn't feel, I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. And it was because I hadn't done the inner work that I needed to do to pursue my purpose and find that fulfillment, which, you know, it's for me and so many of my guests starting a business is that fulfillment. It is that self care.
Angela Masciulli (24:22.67)
People have all these excuses why you shouldn't start a business. I have kids, I don't have time, I don't have money, blah, blah. But if you start a business with impact in that you are sharing your gifts, that is like the greatest self care that you can ever give yourself.
Emily Gorrie (24:40.384)
Yeah, yes, I love that. I think you said it too, right? There's like all these reasons why we shouldn't do certain things, or we think we are stuck in this career path perhaps, that we chose for ourselves and it's too late now, and we shouldn't, there's no safety in starting a business, or, and I would argue there's no safety in being an employee either, right? Your husband experienced that in 2019, right? So, I think there's...
Emily Gorrie (25:09.596)
lot of these false narratives on what is safe for us to do. And I think a lot of us get stuck in just staying where we are because of this unknown of what might happen or what's to come. And I really applaud the folks who are able to sit here and say something just isn't fulfilling. This just isn't working because I think right there
Emily Gorrie (25:38.272)
is step one, you're aware, right? Of that something is not fulfilling you and that this, there perhaps there's that something more, right, you said it, you're like, I don't know exactly what that more is, but I know that there's gotta be something better than this. And I really, yeah, and I applaud people for that because that's the first step of this awareness piece of thinking we can do something differently.
Angela Masciulli (26:03.026)
Mm-hmm. And just to add to what you said is we want to, we, we cosign kind of this concept of safety and being an employee. And I think as parents, men and, you know, dads and moms both do it. This, this idea that we want the safest thing for our family. And so as parents, we're even more prone to kind of fall into that trap and
not answer our calling and not pursue our goals and And put it off delay happiness. We talk about happiness, you know, like I never knew I could be In control of my happiness. I thought before I mean all the things that have happened to me as a result of becoming an entrepreneur I thought like happiness was something that happened to you Like not something you curated like you go on a trip. You're happy that happens to you. It's not something you can cultivate. And yeah.
Emily Gorrie (27:09.9)
I mean, it is wild when you think about it that right, right? It's like, what are you, how are you approaching your ultimate goals, right? Are you just along for the ride? Are we being, you know, floating down the lazy river hoping that we'll, you know, get snagged on something that gives us happiness? Or are we able to actually curate that for ourselves? And I love, and maybe we can talk a little bit about the travel agency.
Emily Gorrie (27:39.916)
for you at the time and when that started and kind of how you were able to use that for kind of curating happiness for other families, for yourself and your family, but also internally, right? Giving yourself some of that flexibility to build this business for yourself. And let's maybe talk about, you mentioned it in the beginning as you were sharing your journey, you almost discredited those
Emily Gorrie (28:08.616)
skills that you had because of just how easy it is? Yeah, you did, right? You did discredit those skills, right? Because of just how easy it is. So maybe talk to us a little bit about overcoming and kind of gaining more confidence in yourself to actually, and maybe the awareness it took to recognize those skills have value.
Angela Masciulli (28:30.226)
Yeah. Well, yeah, it, you know, it's so funny, because I honestly was so desperate for happiness that I really didn't, it was kind of like, let's see how it goes. And I gave my permission and myself permission to be a beginner, which even like people I've worked with in the legal industry were like, wow, like you're, you're like,
Angela Masciulli (28:58.998)
You're gonna start all over again. And I'm like, I thought that was a really interesting comment. Like we don't give ourselves permission to be beginners. And we beat ourselves up. Like I was recently, I'm working on teaching my daughter how to drive and I'm like, she's not beating herself up for hitting the curb or whatnot. She's never done it before, but we constantly do that to ourselves.
Like we think, oh, well, we're adults, so we should know how to do this. Or I had somebody say something to me that they were surprised as a mom that they could learn something new. Isn't that horrible? Like, I mean, we all have these different thoughts, but yeah, I took a lot of my planning and my experience from...
Angela Masciulli (29:56.034)
the legal industry because I don't think people understand all the legal things you need to keep in mind, like terms and conditions and cancellations and making sure what's included in a trip and calendaring due dates. And those were all things that I had done in the legal industry. And it was so rewarding because...
Angela Masciulli (30:20.734)
in the legal industry, I do all of the stuff that other people kind of sign their name to. But, you know, in the travel business, you know, people leave me a review. It's for me, their interaction with me personally. And so, it's so rewarding to take somebody from being overwhelmed and not knowing how to figure out because people don't know what they don't know.
Angela Masciulli (30:48.97)
And they think with the proliferation of information, I can just book my trip myself. I don't even know why you exist. And it's like, oh, well, did you know that they send me special information and special deals and I have a special phone number I call. So I'm not on the phone for three hours or maybe I can be on the phone for three hours for 10 clients instead of you taking hours of time out of your day. And you know.
Angela Masciulli (31:15.674)
I'm in the know, like this is my thing. And so we have to get to this place where we value the information that we have and the abilities that we have because there is so much proliferation of information in any industry that really those, that is a huge value to save somebody time and nobody has time anymore. You know, to, yeah. I mean,
Angela Masciulli (31:45.398)
So to be able to help somebody decide on where they want to go and where they want to stay and then what do they want to do. And then they love it when big families come to me. They don't have to be in the middle of planning all of these people or a big group. They don't want to be in the middle of that. So I'm the one who's sending 20 emails and like, do you want this or do you want that? Do you want this, Kevin? This payment's due, whatever.
Angela Masciulli (32:14.998)
Um, yeah, it's really been an exercise in helping me understand my own worth. Cause I even discounted my abilities in the legal industry as well. So I went, I tripled my income. I don't really like to talk about dollars. Whoa, I make six figures and blah, blah. I, I really hope that we get to this point where we talk about our fulfillment and happiness. I.
Angela Masciulli (32:44.134)
I wish we could quantify that in some way. And that should be our goal. Instead of people being like, how to make six figures in six months or whatever. Like how happy are you? How much do you value yourself? How much do you own who you are and what do you know? And how can you translate that to somebody else? That's, you know, you have that, you have that and you are rich. I mean,
Emily Gorrie (33:14.06)
Yes. And right, I'm sure you can probably attest to this as well, right? As you start to have that internal self-worth and that value of yourself, it translates, right? You're able to then show up the way that you want to show up with your clients. You attract people who want to leverage your services because they see how much you bring to the table. And ultimately, that then becomes dollar signs.
Angela Masciulli (33:41.11)
Right, right. It's, and that's what people don't understand. They live in this kind of area of scarcity where they don't understand that you can actually become a magnet for who you want to attract. You just have to shift your identity to who that is because they have to be able to connect and relate to you. So if you're coming to your business with
Angela Masciulli (34:10.358)
you know, language and just something that is not going to attract a higher ticket client, then that's in it's all about what you what you think you're worth and how much you're willing to receive. Like if you have negative money stories in your head, forget it. Forget it. I've had a money expert on the podcast. I mean, it was just mind blowing.
Angela Masciulli (34:40.314)
Here is like one tip. If somebody wants to, and I have like goosebumps right now, she gave me this mind blowing tip. If you want to receive more money and abundance in your life, one of the things that you have to start doing is use the gifts you're given. How many of us have gifts that we put in the closet or we're like, oh no, you pay too much for that, blah, blah.
Emily Gorrie (34:48.685)
I love it.
Angela Masciulli (35:08.998)
how you do one thing is how you do all things. And you think about it. I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go use the fondue pot my husband bought me 20 years ago.
Emily Gorrie (35:14.472)
I love that. Yes.
Emily Gorrie (35:24.644)
Right. And I think it also can relate to like, you know, and I think every situation is unique, right? And you should take kind of your own situation and evaluate it. But I think it also comes down to like, spend money to make money, like support yourself, right? You are given gifts in that regard. Like I think about, you know, the, what we've been able to receive thus far, right? Financially.
Emily Gorrie (35:53.348)
from clients, can we, obviously with our livelihoods in mind, I don't recommend we go like spending it all on one thing, but it's like, can we support ourselves as a mom and an entrepreneur by hiring help or outside, outsourcing some things to the outside and finding maybe it's a coach to support us with these limiting beliefs of being able to use the gift
finances that we have at our disposal now. Obviously, each situation is different, but can we use some of that to support our growth and then receive and know that we're worthy of more coming in? I love that tip though. It gave me goosebumps too. Whew.
Angela Masciulli (36:36.69)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, no. And here's the amazing thing too, is once you start working on, I can do this. I am worthy. I have a lot of value. You start to trust yourself to do what you mentioned. Start, you know, one of the hardest things for me to do was hire a VA. And she's amazing. And I
And, you know, it's like, what the heck? And every level will bring new resistance and new things that you have to work through. But it's really amazing. And I think that becoming an entrepreneur really truly is, should you accept the challenge, one of the greatest personal development opportunities you'll ever encounter.
Emily Gorrie (37:34.732)
Yes, yes, absolutely. I mean, I think when we put ourselves out there and we do something that scares us or that brings up different emotions or feelings, I mean, that is where the growth happens, right? Like that is where we start to see these shifts and these changes. And I always say too, and I have said this a million times, probably if we were to count them across all of these episodes, like action leads to clarity, right? So if we can just start trying to take some action and put ourselves out there, ultimately we'll get to a place where we get clearer on maybe what's holding us back or these limiting beliefs or what really matters to us. And I think there's just something to be said about starting. And I want to talk just a little bit about that. And you had said earlier, kind of in this dialogue just now, right? It surprised you.
Emily Gorrie (38:34.348)
when someone said to you, oh, you're starting over, like you're just gonna start again, like we don't give ourselves this permission to be beginners and there's a lot of shame that comes with that sometimes. And I wanna talk a little bit about kind of how we support ourselves in trying something new. Like how do we make that leap? Like what is your maybe one takeaway or piece of advice for somebody who's like, I have all these opinions swirling around me. I'm recognizing maybe some shame or some fear that this path that I've created for myself thus far isn't working. I want to try something new. What are people going to think? What do we do? How do we make that leap and just make that choice for ourselves.
Angela Masciulli (39:30.006)
Yeah, right. Well, I think I can think of four things. One thing you need to know is that from about the age of seven or so, you are running a program that you have adopted from those experiences and you're running that same tape and you're picking up things along the way. And until you purposely change that story in your mind, it's going to remain the same.
Number two, how often do you say things negative to yourself that you wouldn't even say to a friend or a loved one? How many times? We are incredibly terrible to ourselves. Like we beat ourselves up on a level that if somebody could hear what we were saying, they would just be appalled. So here's what you do. You say the negative thing you're telling yourself out loud.
Because once you start hearing yourself say it out loud, you're like, holy crap, that's not true.
You know, you, right, like you have to learn and make it, like you have to make your mental tenacity as important as like your physical fitness or your business acumen, or like we have not prioritized that in our society. And I hope that that, you know, becomes more of a priority.
So you have to make that a priority. You have to cultivate it. Like if you plant weeds, you're gonna get weeds. But if you're constantly planting negative thoughts, nothing is going to change in your life. So you have to take responsibility. Nobody's gonna come rescue you. Nobody's gonna come up to you and go, you know what, you're really treating yourself terribly, stop. Because nobody knows. We do it in silence for the most part.
So that, so those are first two things. Three, like you have to look for evidence that what you want to achieve is possible. Like whatever you want to do. You have to find somebody who's doing it because success leaves clues. There's evidence of what they're doing and that is successful. So what you know we focus on expands. Like have you ever like
been interested in buying a new car, and then suddenly you see everybody driving it, that same car. So that is proof that whatever you begin to focus on expands in your mind. So if you wanna live in the doldrums, if you want to live the life that is just not fulfilling, then continue to focus on the negative things you know, people tell me all that they can't do and I say, okay, so now let's talk about what you can do. So we are way more acquainted with our shortcomings than things that we can do. So make sure that you're very aware of that. And then, you know, you have to be willing to take messy action. Like,
You know, perfectionism is a trauma response, 95% out of 100. And then connected with that perfectionism is worrying about what other people are going to think. And one of the most mind-blowing things that I learned on my journey when it comes to worrying about what other people think is that it's none of your business. It's none of your business what other people think of you. Because it is a mirror of their experience. It has nothing to do with you. So who cares what they think? The people who don't like you are probably never gonna like you anyway. Everybody's got your, they have their own journey. It's their problem. You know, as long as you're not doing something to harm them, you know, I'm not advocating. Do whatever you want, who cares? But you know, you know what I mean, within reason, if you're wanting to
launch a new product and you don't do it live because you're worried about what other people say, who cares? Give yourself permission to do it badly. Who cares? You've never done it before. Why should you be great at it? You know, I will never change my podcast trailer or the first episodes. I don't care because it's a reminder of where I started. Like hours like in the floor, sweating bullets, like it's horrible. It is horrible. Like you think, oh, I'm just hugging a microphone. Oh no, it's horrible. But you have to do it.
Emily Gorrie (44:25.927)
Yeah, yeah, the nerves. Yeah. Yep.
Emily Gorrie (44:35.944)
But yes, yes. And until you start doing it, right, you're not going to get the practice, right? It's like the example you gave with your daughter in learning to drive, right? It's like, we're not going to get better just by like playing it over and over again in our minds. Like we actually have to do it
Angela Masciulli (44:55.202)
Then also, get somebody to help you. We don't go try to drive by ourself. We don't go try to learn how to walk as toddlers by ourself. We don't try to swim by ourself. We don't, you know, but for some reason, as an adult, it's so interesting to me that we expect we should know it. Like I can watch some YouTube videos, I'll be fine.
Maybe you can figure it out, but it will take you much more time. And there is, you know, and when you become an entrepreneur, especially, there's so much more you want to accomplish. There's so much more you want to do in time. It really changes your relationship with time. In addition to parenthood, parenthood really changes your relationship. You're always on borrowed time. So, I mean, it's, it's just, you know, have, give yourself some. Like, ease up on the criticism and, you know, look for mentors, look for help, look, you know.
Emily Gorrie (46:02.24)
Yeah, I love that. I love that. And I think there's so much to be said for giving yourself the support you need to like remind yourself just how valuable your gifts are and what you bring to the table. I mean, there are people out there who will be and want to be our biggest cheerleaders and we don't have to do it on our own. And I, so I love that reminder. And I wanna talk a little really briefly before we wrap up.
You just mentioned it here, this relationship with time and time management. And you also mentioned, as we were prepping for this, energy management. And I think when we become business owners and we become new moms, and a lot of those listening are women who are in this newer mom phase. So we have young kids under five who are very needy so to speak, right? They are learning all these new things for the first time and we are the guide for them, right, as they're learning this world. So I want to talk a little bit about kind of how we manage this borrowed time and kind of tips that you have to kind of give ourselves permission to be present moms, be present business owners, and how do we ultimately manage our
energies between the two. I mean, I know when we, you know, for me personally, when I start something new, I get really excited and I just want to like go full force into it and I, you know, can get lost in hours that I don't have in something. So how do we manage these facets of energy and time between motherhood and individual business goals and personal development? Like, how do we manage all of that?
Angela Masciulli (47:47.429)
Yeah, well, I have a couple tips, and I'll give you a link to a time audit. You have to do a time audit. And especially with kids, you have to be aware of where you're spending your time. And I love how you mention energy and connection with that, because we think our time is our most precious resource, but it's really our energy. Because.
How do we feel when we're doing certain things? And that really is a clue to us that we need to make a change. And one of the other important things is that we need to know that our brains are predisposed to think that the more complicated something is, the better it is. The more difficult it is, the better it is. It is, it's just, we're neurologically wired that way.
So one, we have to get rid of the limiting belief that things have to be complicated and hard. They do not. Actually, when they're complicated and hard, that's when you know you need to make a change. And I love to tell the story about how during the pandemic, we have a Costco, my daughter is like this chocolate milk that can only get a Costco that's a half hour away. So here I'm thinking.
I have to drive a half hour there, drive a half hour back, walk around Costco, spend way more than I want to probably. I don't wanna go. So my daughter is like, mom, just Instacart it. And I'm like, no, I can do it myself, it's fine. And one day I just had, I didn't have any other choice. I'm like, okay, I'm just gonna give this Insta whatever a try, life changing.
I mean, it literally, I rarely go to Costco anymore. So not only have I saved, I love every time I use the app, it tells me how much time I've saved over the use of the app, but I can, I've probably saved thousands. But I've also probably gotten several days of my life back. And I don't particularly like to shop. You know, it drains me.
So add all of those things together. And it was a siren that I needed to do things differently. And I did, and I love it. So audit your time. In addition to auditing your time, how are you feeling when you're doing certain tasks?
If you are, one of your tasks is making baby food, for instance, maybe you need to order it from some organic baby food place and not work on, you know, giving yourself this hard task that drains your energy. Maybe you hate it. Maybe it's even during cooking. How do you feel when you cook? Do you feel overwhelmed that this is always your job and always your responsibility?
And you always have to figure it out because that's how I feel about foods sometimes. It's always on me. Mom, they don't ask dad what we're having for dinner. They ask me. So, you know, it's like, okay, maybe HelloFresh is an option. Maybe, maybe sitting down and going over the menu is an option. Like, fine, like don't whatever we...
you know, allow persists. Like it's not gonna get any better until we change it. So once you audit your time and you understand, okay, this is draining me, we need to find a better way, then proactively work on that. And then the thing is, if it doesn't go the way you want it to, just gosh, again, give yourself grace. Like I had this like amazing, especially his mom's,
This amazing guest on my podcast, Sarah Greener, who's a coach, she told the story about how she was running several businesses, working 60 to 80 hours a week, trying to do it all. Like you can't run a business and be a mom in the same way as before you ran a business. So she was still trying to do all of the housework, cleaning, blah, and really had set expectations for
who she wanted to be as a mom that didn't align with her daughter's expectations. So also as you're trying to manage it all, make sure you're incorporating the right expectations. Like are you incorporating society's expectations, your parents' expectations, your friends, your sister's expectations? Like who are you doing this for? Like get...
clear on that and how are you feeling? What's your energy like? And then you have to take care of yourself. Not last. We're not somewhere in the middle. We're last.
You cannot serve other people from an empty cup. You just can't. If you continue to try to do that, and I think so many new entrepreneurs do, I've done that, you're gonna hit a place. I'm not a good place. And you're just gonna have to shut it down and go, okay, why am I doing this? And where do I wanna be? And how do I get there? And...
You know, I had to do that several times and I think it really changes, especially with kids. They're in a new developmental stage, their naps change, their grades change, their school times change. It's summer, it's winter break, it's... you're constantly on this like evolving schedule and that can really work with you if you...
approach it as an opportunity to constantly try to be better.
Emily Gorrie (54:15.808)
Yeah, yeah, I love that. I think also too, like when you had shared, right, like how can we take some things off our plate that aren't giving us the energy we wanna feel? I think the big piece to that too is what do you fill, what do you backfill then? What goes into that time is so important. So you've taken, you've gotten all these hours back in your day being conscious of what we're filling in with.
Is it more tasks that don't bring us joy? Is it tasks that are expected of us elsewhere? Or are we actually able to take that time that we've given ourselves and put ourselves first to be the mom we want to be and be more present? Is it to do the parts in our business that bring us joy? Is it to read a book or take a nap because physically we are exhausted? I think that's a...
Big part of it too is just making sure that we are filling in with things that align with our values versus what is expected of us also.
Angela Masciulli (55:17.122)
Thank you.
Angela Masciulli (55:25.53)
Yeah, and I think it's really important too. I am somebody who is very much affected by my surroundings and clutter. And I also think it's very important to declutter your physical environment, but also your calendar, the people you hang out with. Not, it's not just about your schedule. Who are you, what are you agreeing to? What are you co-signing?
Consciously or subconsciously that is absolutely draining you So you have to look at all aspects of your life You really do because I mean one of my points it's like last summer My husband was like, are you okay? And I was like I know And it was not yeah, it was My daughters were on this
you know, they had some activities and to people we needed to cut out. So we did that and the result was really amazing. So you can't be afraid to do that.
Emily Gorrie (56:29.088)
Hmm... Mm-hmm.
Emily Gorrie (56:36.412)
Mm. Yes. I love that. I love that. Yeah. I always say to my husband, I'm like, you can't. And he's so, my husband's so social and he's like all over the place. Like he wants to like see people like all the time. And I'm like, wait, my energy, I need to protect it. Like these three people can come around at any time. You can invite them over without asking me. Doesn't matter. They are welcome at any time. And then there's
this list of people where I'm like, you really need to run it by me because it really depends on what else I have going on that week. And you start to recognize that, yeah, it's about what is around you also that's draining you. And there's, you know, people are a big part of that because they bring their own stories, their own perceptions and their expectations to the table as well. And it's a lot, it's a lot. So I really appreciate that reminder.
Angela Masciulli (57:16.238)
Mm-hmm.
Angela Masciulli (57:26.882)
Right.
Emily Gorrie (57:31.342)
It's like, who are you surrounding yourself with?
Angela Masciulli (57:34.214)
And right, and then another one of the mind blowing things I learned on my journey is when somebody said, you don't owe anybody anything. You really don't outside of your immediate family. And we constantly act like we do. Like we give away our energy and trust me, those energy vampires, they can seek out those people who will give it away freely from miles away. They're like, yes.
Emily Gorrie (58:11.328)
Yeah, I think there's ultimately, it's ultimately the permission we give ourselves, right? To remember that we are worthy of our values, that we are worthy of our boundaries, that we are worthy of our safe containers and our energy and our desires. And that, yeah, we don't owe anybody.
Emily Gorrie (58:40.34)
anything, no explanation, no time, no... I don't even know what else at this moment, but right, except our immediate families who ultimately, you know, who we're doing this for. I mean, they are why we are contemplating making choices and changes and how do we be present. And I just think that reminder is so beautiful and just, we all need to put it as a sticky note on our mirrors every single day.
You don't owe anybody anything today. Yep.
Angela Masciulli (59:13.442)
I don't know. I mean, and really, you know, as what the kind of idea that started the show is that just being you is good enough. Like you don't have to do all the extra things. You just the way you are is good enough. And the number one thing that you can do for yourself and your business is to really get to know who you are.
And as mothers, we have so many distractions that take us away from that. And just becoming a mom changes our identity. And, you know, and that's fine, but we can't lose ourselves in the shuffle because they're going to grow up. They're, they're, they're going to go and do their own thing. Right. Exactly. And, you know.
Emily Gorrie (01:00:14.116)
I mean, that is such a beautiful reminder too. And I think if we can remember that as individuals, we are absolutely worthy of being here and still having joys just for ourselves outside of motherhood, outside of being a business owner. Like we can make different choices at any time. You know, it really is empowering to kind of think about life that way. So I wanna give you a quick moment as we wrap this up, just to give us a brief rundown of where listeners can find you, how can they engage with you, how can they start a conversation with you if that is in their hearts.
Angela Masciulli (01:00:52.086)
Yeah, you can find me at mombusinesscoach.com. You can go there and check out the podcast. You can see what we're up to whenever you hear this episode. And you'll see all the social links there. And then there'll be a link to a time audit that I'll give you where people can go and check that out. So I think what I'll make it mombusinesscoach.com slash time audit.
That's, that's, I'll create that. Yeah, so, um, but yeah, I, it's been a pleasure talking with you. It just fills my bucket. I think it's so incredible. We live in this time where we can connect virtually. We, you know, it's just amazing. And, you know, we should do all of the inner work to get out of our way so we can make more connections and share what we're doing and what we're meant
Emily Gorrie (01:01:53.612)
Yep, absolutely. And Angela, this was incredible. I am so grateful that you took the time and shared this with me and with us today. I think there's so much that I learned. So I am grateful and we will make sure to link all of those in the show notes so people know where to access you and can engage.
Angela Masciulli (01:02:13.462)
Yeah, it was wonderful, Emily. Thank you.